Santa?

I was sleeping with a G-string and then I realised that the G-string I am wearing was my Dad's. So I went to the bathroom and changed into diapers as I would shit my pants often. Then as I was changing,my watch then said,"Merry Christmas." I feel touched that even a watch said that,so I poke it with my penis then go back to sleep. Then as soon I place my head on my brother thighs to get some sleep, I suddenly heard a loud crash... Right there,shit my pants.

Then I got out of my room to see what happen.There was a man in the living room. A big,fat,old,wearing a red costume,with a red hat that is with a small white cotton ball and his ass was showing. I could not believe it, it was santa! Then before I could shout," Your ass is sexy." he turned around... He... He was a black guy. BOOM! Mindrape. A black santa... so the watch was actually warning me about this black shit.

He looked at me and said,"Sup bitch! Merry shitty christmas to you. Here, take this." He then hand me a present. After that he took a gun and shot himself. Luckily I am a cannibal so there are no traces of santa...Wait,if I ate santa,that mean I ruin Christmas...? Well anyway, I opened that box.There was nothing except for a piece of paper,it says," By the way bitch, I got AIDS."
BOOM! Mindfuck.

Note: Merry Christmas! Now go suck a guy's dick

Random Post 1

Okay... So I ran out of ideas to continue the story. So let's read some racist jokes! Now,the jokes are related World War II, in a country named Singapore.

There was 3 men, a Chinese man, an Eurasian man, and an Malay man. Now these three men where chased by some Japanese soldier. Then at some point,they reach the forest. The Chinese man and Malay man knew that the forest is magical. As when a person touch a tree and say an object,the person will become that object.

So the Chinese man touch the tree and said,"Let me become a deer, so that I can run away." The Chinese man became a deer.

Next the Malay man touch the tree and said."Let me become a bird, so that I can fly away." The Malay man became a bird.

The Eurasian man was fascinated and thought what animal he want to be. But before that he was shot by the a Japanese soldier. So the Eurasian accidentally touched the tree and said,"SHIT!" And he became what he said

Okay let's read another one.

Three men, one was a Buddhist, one was a Christian, and one was a an Indian. They were very religious. One day they were chased by Japanese soldiers. They then decided to hide to their own respective places of worship.

The Buddhist went to the temple, push away the Buddha statue, positioned himself and acted like the Buddha. The Japanese soldier did not caught him.

The Christian went to the church, push away the Jesus statue that was on the cross, positioned himself and acted like Jesus. The Japanese soldier did not caught him.

The Indian went to the temple, push away the Elephant god statue, took off his pants and did a hand stand. He was caught.

It came back?!

So it has been days...actually more than a week.Everything was normal...very normal,like shitting once every hour normal...So I thought that everything was back to normal.Until today...It started like this.I was waking up,feeling so sick as I just have sex with an chimpanzee.So I went to the toilet and start taking a shit. Then as I got up,I looked at the bowl, then suddenly there are bubbles coming up,lots of bubbles.That was when I knew that shit going to happen.

But on the second thought, it could be that my shit is trying to breathe under-water.So I flush it down with my high-pressured pee and when back to my room.That was when I don't know shit going to happen.So back to my room,I heard a voice calling me...a familiar voice.At first I freaked out, then I looked at my watch.It says,"The return of..." Then I was like,"WTF?!" Then when I looked behind,it was the ghost of the talking fish.OMG

He then said,"I have come a long way to reach you.You are the one who killed me...Actually, you ate me.You ate a very intelligent species.And now because of that,you shall share the same fate as me! WAHAHAHAH noob!" I realised that I was going to die.There are so many things I have not do,like trying to suck my own cock,cut my balls off, and turn into a jet plane. Just then,something hit me and I said,"If you so smart,why did you get eaten?"That's when the ghost bow down and worshiped me as a god and then I screwed his brain off. Best fish ever screwed.

Note:When something tells you no, you shout back and say,"That's what your mum said last night!"

The truth

This few days...a lot of things have happened.But everything seems weird...At first I thought it was my imagination or I was too high on drugs...Talking shit and talking fish?! Was all this normal? Or am I normal?I have not been sleeping much thinking about this...But one thing I must say...That talking fish is the best food I have ever eaten! So awesome dude! Hahah,but still taste like chicken...

Okay,so I discussed this matter with my family...Yes their first reaction was,"You on drugs?!" But as soon I talked about the talking fish, my parents face changed.My mother then said,"Son... all this is happening... is because...you are going through puberty son." Now I know that my mother is mentally challenged. If you don't know what does that mean,you are mentally challenged.

But then my father said,"All this...is number of tests you must go through.Because you are my son, you share a special blood.Thus you must go through all this shit."Now I know my parents are seriously fucked up...I mean talking to a fish is a test?!He then give me a watch that doesn't tells time,instead it gives hint on what is going to happen next test. Then I said that I ate that talking fish...and that was a first time I saw an adult emo-ing...

Note:Darkness is actually light...but darker

Talking fish?

So like any other day, I woke up without any pants on.Then I remembered that I was suppose to feed the fish. So I grabbed a pants, and made my may towards my balcony,where the fish is.I was about to take the fish food when something happened...

Fish:Hey you with the dickface!

Me:WTF?! Who is that?

F:Behind you dickface!

M:Shit! I guess this is the after effect on drugs.

F:Stupid idiot! Look at the fish!

M:You are talking?! A talking fish?!

F:Okay dude,yes I am talking, listen have something...

M:Awesome! I am talking to a fish! Woo Hoo!

F:Will you shut up! Dude you need to release me from this prison.

M:Why would I do that?

F:If you do that,I will grant you any wish.

M:Any wish?

F:Any wish.

M:Well...I always wanted to eat a talking fish.

And I ate him for lunch

Note:Yes,there may be racist jokes here and there...happy now?!

Playing too much PSP?

Okay,today was weird.I was playing with my PSP half-naked,when suddenly the screen of the PSP glow brightly.The next moment,I realised I was inside the PSP.Well not exactly in the PSP,as in like there is a virtual world.How I would know?Because I realised I was wearing an armor,carrying a heavy weapon and facing off a monster.Yup,I was in the world of Monster Hunter.

For those loser who do not know what is a 'Monster Hunter'.By the looking at the title,it is obvious it is a game where you hunt monsters.So like I said, I was facing off a monster.It was a Kushala Dora,an elder dragon,a very irritating monster if I say so myself.At that time,I shit my pants.I was like,"WTF!HOLY MOTHER!"

Then the dragon came closer and closer, letting me smell his horrible breath,and then shouted,"WAKE UP!"It was then I realised, that I have passed out in the toilet while shitting,and that voice was from the shit that I've just shitted.That's right a talking shit.

Note:This is my third post.Haha, fooled you.But seriously,this is my first post.Haha,fooled you again.Wow, you are so easy to fool...fool

Random...?

You know...there many theories regarding about life...one of them is randomness.People believed that many things happens because of chance and coincidence,or in other term..shit happens.

But others believe things happen for a reason,everything has a "cause and effect".Which I think most of the people believe this,as they would want to think that there is a reason to life,a meaning.Thus they would need something to believe on why are they create or what purpose they have,which I think this is why people believe in gods.

And others believe there is a pattern in everything...everything is like a cycle, much like the cycle of reincarnation.Things will happen again eventually...like history will repeat itself.Maybe human evolution will not advance...instead humans will become much more premitive and their intelligence will slowly deteriorate.Or like the universe will become smaller and smaller, then it may cause another big bang...and thus life has been restarted

But hey,who cares about all this shit? When you step to this blog,you will experience a world of fantasy,maybe some sarcastic humor,and a whole lot of random bullshit.

Note:I started this blog when I have seriously nothing to do on the web..and no, I do have a life...and no, porn is boring XD